Written by Erin Edwards, Ph.D, LP

“Oh there’s no place like home for the holidays…” or so the Perry Como song goes. But for many college students and their families, returning home for the holidays can be a source of stress. Here at Ballard Clinic, we work with many college students and their families to support a rewarding holiday experience. Here are some strategies for your family to consider:

• Discuss Expectations: Before returning home, students and their families are encouraged to talk about their expectations for the holiday. Is the student expecting to catch up with their high school friends or meet up with their college buddies? Is the parent expecting their child to help out around the house or take grandma to the airport? Students and their families can work together to create a holiday plan that everyone can agree on.

• Allow for Independence: While at school, many college students become accustomed to a greater level of independence than they experienced at home. Parents are encouraged to respect this newfound independence while students are encouraged to respect the “house rules” of their families home.

• Expect Change: Parents often assume that the family will return to functioning “as normal,” when their children return home but this is often not the case. The family living at home has arrived at a new balance without their college student and the college student has created a life independent of the family. It will take time for the family to create a “new normal.” 

• Manage Stress: While exciting, the holidays can also be a stressful time. Ensure that each family member makes time for what they need to be at their best be it time for exercise, naps, walks outside, or playing with your pets. Try not to over schedule your holiday and leave room for rest. 

• Focus on the Big Picture: If you find yourself getting caught up in the details– who’s bringing the rolls? Do we have enough silverware?– take a minute to zoom out and think about the big picture. What does this holiday mean to you? What do you want to get out of it? Sometimes taking a moment to think about the big picture can help you release stress about the little things. 

If your family needs additional support this time of year, Ballard Clinic is here to help.